In my list of 10 Simple Joys that I wrote last year, I mentioned that I was deciding on a nice anniversary gift for my parents. The anniversary gift that I was thinking of getting them then was to take them to either Singapore or Hong Kong. This was supposed to be for July 2008 because July was both their birth month and their wedding month. I was psyched about this plan since it would be Papa and Mama’s first time to fly out of the country and I knew it would really make them happy. I was leaning toward bringing them to Hong Kong because I knew my dad would love to be in a place closest to Mainland China at least so he could try authentic Chinese food (My dad has this weird fascination with anything Chinese although he’s only 25% of it, lol), while my mom would love to do some bargain shopping.

But for some reason, I discarded this plan. Maybe I was thinking about how much the trip would cost me especially during a time that I was saving for the rainy days. True enough, the “rainy days” began the day my dad was brought to the hospital last year. I could keep telling myself now that not pushing through with the trip was a good move because of all the unexpected expenses that came pouring in, but I can’t help feeling sad and regretful. I should have pushed through with the plan! It would have been a memorable experience not only for Papa, but for Mama and I. Never mind how much it would have cost, money can always be obtained.

But I just let the chance pass, didn’t I? I only have myself to blame.

During that trip to Hong Kong with Mae last month, I kept thinking about Papa and how much he would have enjoyed exploring the city. Everywhere we went, I’d imagine his joyful reaction to everything. I got sentimental the most when we dined at a real Chinese restaurant in Temple Street to try out real Chinese food. I’m positive my dad would have loved it!

templest

Today is Papa’s 55th birthday. I miss him everyday. If I could go back to last year and make his 54th birthday more special, I would. But I know he wouldn’t be happy to know that I’ve been feeling this way since he left. There really is no use crying over spilled milk, but what happened has taught me to embrace opportunities as they come.

Chances are so hard to come by and the second one is impossible to find.